For years, I carried the invisible weight of being the default parent, the primary caregiver—the one who gets the first call from daycare, knows the doctor’s appointments, remembers birthday parties and sorts the gifts, and keeps track of school events. It wasn’t just about doing more—it was about holding it all together. Not because anyone said it was my job, but because, over time, it just became that way. And when I separated, I thought that load would finally shift. But what I didn’t expect was how complicated that shift would feel.

Separating often results in the need for a crash course in finances.